Digest

This episode of Color Daddy features Stossy Shroder, a reality TV personality and author, as a guest. The conversation covers a wide range of topics, including Stossy's experiences with pregnancy, her evolving fashion sense, her time on Vanderpump Rules, and her personal journey of self-discovery. Stossy shares her unique perspective on pregnancy, discussing the challenges of being pregnant during COVID, the importance of compliments from other women, and her husband's supportive role. She also opens up about the changes in her sex drive during pregnancy and the importance of honesty and transparency about the realities of pregnancy. The conversation then shifts to fashion, with Stossy revealing her pregnancy alter ego, "Santa," and her embrace of her rounder figure. They discuss the influence of Gen Z on fashion and Stossy's evolving style choices. A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to Stossy's time on Vanderpump Rules, where she shares her thoughts on Tom Sandoval, the recent scandal, and the impact of online hate. She reflects on her past behavior and how she's evolved since her time on the show, emphasizing the importance of saying no and prioritizing her own well-being. The conversation delves into the concept of "dark passenger," a term Stossy uses to describe intense jealousy and anger, often stemming from past trauma or insecurities. She shares her personal experience with this, highlighting the importance of recognizing red flags in relationships. Stossy also advocates for couples therapy, challenging the stigma surrounding it and emphasizing its benefits for communication and building a stronger foundation. She discusses the importance of quality time and shared values in maintaining intimacy, particularly when physical intimacy is not a priority. The episode concludes with Stossy reflecting on her busy life, juggling motherhood, touring, and podcast hosting. She acknowledges the challenges of balancing multiple ventures but emphasizes her ability to thrive in this environment. She shares her strategies for managing her time and prioritizing her various commitments, highlighting the importance of finding joy and fulfillment in each aspect of her life.

Outlines

00:00:00

Intro, Pregnancy, and Fashion

The podcast begins with music and Alex Cooper introduces the episode, welcoming Stossy Shroder to Color Daddy. They discuss the podcast setup and Alex's preference for not wearing headphones while recording. Stossy shares her experience of being pregnant during COVID and how it differs from her current pregnancy. They discuss the importance of compliments from other women and how Stossy's husband handles her pregnancy. Stossy opens up about the challenges of her sex drive during pregnancy and how she manages it. They discuss the importance of honesty and transparency about the realities of pregnancy, including the less glamorous aspects. Stossy reveals her pregnancy alter ego, "Santa," and how she embraces her rounder figure and jolly spirit. They discuss the concept of "OOTD" and Alex's decision to buy a national holiday for it. Stossy shares her past love for statement necklaces and how she's evolved in her fashion choices. They discuss the influence of Gen Z on fashion and how they embrace a more inclusive and expressive approach.

00:13:36

Prada, Vanderpump Rules, and Online Hate

Alex shares her observation of Stossy's connection with Prada and how she's become a \"Prada girl.\" They discuss a random fact about pregnancy from Selling Sunset and Stossy's experience with shaving her V. Stossy shares her experience of writing two New York Times bestsellers and how she still struggles with imposter syndrome. They discuss the time it takes to write a book and Stossy's approach to creating a \"basic bitch handbook.\" Alex and Stossy play a game, deciphering whether various things are \"basic\" or not. They discuss the difference between \"chugi\" and \"basa\" and Stossy's personal preference for leaning into things that bring her joy. Alex and Stossy continue their game, discussing whether apparel sprites, get ready with me videos, and TomTom are basic. They share their personal opinions and experiences with these topics. Alex and Stossy discuss the topic of ozempic and whether it's basic. They share their personal thoughts and experiences with bone broth and ozempic, emphasizing the importance of honesty and transparency. Alex and Stossy discuss the concept of manifesting and Stossy shares an example of how she manifested her dream home. They transition to talking about reality TV and Stossy's experience with the recent scandal on Vanderpump Rules. Stossy shares her perspective on Tom Sandoval and how she never liked him. They discuss the evolution of reality TV and how social media has changed the way viewers interact with the shows and the cast members. Stossy discusses her friendships with Katie, Lala, and the producers from Vanderpump Rules. They discuss the online hate Tom Sandoval is receiving and Stossy's perspective on online hate and its impact on people's mental health.

00:37:31

Stasi's Evolution and the Power of Saying No

Alex and Stossy reflect on Stossy's time on Vanderpump Rules and how she's evolved since then. They discuss Stossy's past behavior and how she's learned from her mistakes. Stossy shares her favorite thing about being in her 30s: the power of saying no and prioritizing her own happiness and well-being. They discuss the importance of setting boundaries and not feeling obligated to explain oneself. Alex and Stossy discuss the difference between Stossy being hammered in her 20s versus her 30s. They talk about how motherhood has changed Stossy's drinking habits and how she's learned to manage her alcohol consumption. Stossy explains the meaning of \"dark passenger,\" a term she often uses on her podcast. The conversation delves into the concept of \"dark passenger,\" a term used to describe intense jealousy and anger. The speaker shares her personal experience with this, revealing how her past trauma and insecurities led to extreme reactions in her relationships. She emphasizes the importance of recognizing red flags, especially when a partner consistently prioritizes friends over their significant other. The speaker discusses her past obsession with her birthday, attributing it to a desire to make up for missed celebrations in her youth. However, she reveals that she has since grown out of this, finding it unnecessary to make a big deal about it. She acknowledges the pressure to maintain a certain persona for reality TV, but emphasizes that she now prioritizes authenticity and genuine happiness.

00:52:13

Couples Therapy, Maintaining Intimacy, and Toxic Relationships

The speaker advocates for couples therapy, challenging the stigma surrounding it. She emphasizes that seeking professional help early on can be beneficial for any relationship, as it allows partners to address their individual baggage and work towards a stronger foundation. She shares her own experience with therapy, highlighting how it helped her and her partner communicate effectively and build trust. The speaker discusses the importance of quality time and shared values in maintaining intimacy within a relationship, especially when physical intimacy is not a priority. She emphasizes the importance of aligning on core values, particularly when raising children, as it creates a strong foundation for a lasting bond. She also highlights the importance of enjoying each other's company and finding joy in everyday moments. The speaker shares her insights on recognizing and moving on from toxic relationships. She emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and recognizing when a pattern of unhealthy behavior is repeating itself. She encourages listeners to trust their instincts and prioritize their own well-being, even if it means letting go of a relationship that is no longer serving them. The speaker acknowledges the ups and downs of early relationships, particularly the intense emotions and rollercoaster of experiences. She encourages listeners to embrace these experiences as part of personal growth, but also emphasizes the importance of recognizing when it's time to move on from unhealthy patterns. She highlights the value of finding a partner who accepts and supports their authentic self. The speaker shares her experience of recognizing her current partner as \"the one.\" She emphasizes the importance of feeling completely comfortable and secure in a relationship, without the need to censor oneself. She highlights the value of a partner who not only accepts but also champions their authentic self, even if it means embracing their \"basic bitch\" side.

00:58:14

Touring, Sobriety, and Balancing Multiple Ventures

The speaker discusses the joys and challenges of touring, highlighting the creative process, the thrill of performing, and the importance of connecting with fans. She acknowledges the demanding nature of touring, especially while balancing motherhood and personal life. She shares her strategies for managing the pressure and finding a balance that works for her. The speaker reveals her journey with sobriety and how it has impacted her touring experience. She shares how being sober has given her more energy, focus, and clarity, allowing her to perform at her best. She also discusses the challenges of staying sober while on the road, but emphasizes the positive impact it has had on her overall well-being. The speaker reflects on her busy life, juggling motherhood, touring, and podcast hosting. She acknowledges the challenges of balancing multiple ventures but emphasizes her ability to thrive in this environment. She shares her strategies for managing her time and prioritizing her various commitments, highlighting the importance of finding joy and fulfillment in each aspect of her life.

01:02:07

Outro

The podcast concludes with a final message from Alex Cooper, thanking Stossy Shroder for joining the show and encouraging listeners to follow her on social media.

Keywords

Q&A

• What are some of the challenges of being pregnant during COVID?

  Stossy shares that her first pregnancy during COVID was isolating and limited her ability to live a normal life. She couldn't leave her house, work, travel, or enjoy social interactions.

• How does Stossy's husband handle her pregnancy?

  Stossy says her husband is great and tries to make her feel good about herself, but she still needs compliments from other women to feel truly validated.

• What is Stossy's perspective on Tom Sandoval from Vanderpump Rules?

  Stossy has never liked Tom Sandoval and believes he's always been a \"slime ball.\" She feels he's often blamed others for his actions and deflected responsibility.

• How does Stossy feel about the online hate Tom Sandoval is receiving?

  Stossy believes online hate is a harmful way to punish people and that it's not right to emotionally \"behead\" someone. She acknowledges that Tom Sandoval's actions were wrong but believes that online hate is excessive and can have serious consequences.

• How has Stossy evolved since her time on Vanderpump Rules?

  Stossy acknowledges that she was incredibly selfish in her 20s and thought the world revolved around her. She's learned to be more mindful of her words and actions and prioritizes her own happiness and well-being.

• What is the \"dark passenger\" and how does it relate to jealousy and trust issues?

  The \"dark passenger\" refers to intense jealousy, anger, or other negative emotions that can take over a person's thoughts and actions. It often stems from past trauma or insecurities, leading to extreme reactions in relationships. The speaker's experience highlights how past betrayals and a lack of trust can trigger these intense emotions.

• Why does the speaker believe that couples therapy is beneficial, even for seemingly healthy relationships?

  The speaker believes that couples therapy can be beneficial for any relationship, as it allows partners to address their individual baggage and work towards a stronger foundation. It provides a safe space for open communication, understanding, and resolving conflicts.

• How does the speaker maintain intimacy with her partner when their sex drives differ?

  The speaker emphasizes the importance of quality time and shared values in maintaining intimacy. They prioritize spending meaningful time together, engaging in activities that foster connection, and aligning on core values, particularly in areas like parenting.

• What advice does the speaker offer for recognizing and moving on from toxic relationships?

  The speaker encourages listeners to trust their instincts and prioritize their own well-being, even if it means letting go of a relationship that is no longer serving them. She emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and recognizing when a pattern of unhealthy behavior is repeating itself.

• How has sobriety impacted the speaker's touring experience?

  The speaker shares how being sober has given her more energy, focus, and clarity, allowing her to perform at her best. She acknowledges the challenges of staying sober while on the road, but emphasizes the positive impact it has had on her overall well-being.

Show Notes